To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I have demons in me.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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