He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
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Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
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