And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Randomize