Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
