you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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