Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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