i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
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