That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Holy sore nipples Batman
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
My bed smells like the plague
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
