woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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