Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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