drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize