I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I want to have your abortion
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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