i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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