i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
