hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Randomize
