is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
