Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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