I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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