I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
he laminated a picture of his dick.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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