I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Randomize