Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
he was CRYING into my vagina
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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