her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
