But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
