Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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