That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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