Fine. I'll sleep in my office
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Rumble strips road head = magical
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
