The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
someone threw a dead crab at me
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
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