It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
