My friends, they love my intelligence
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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