Don't you send me to vm
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
