After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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