Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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