AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
