so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize