Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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