The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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