What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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