Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
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