I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
