stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Randomize