I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
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