So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
