Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
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