he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
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