the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
