I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
