Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(847): View more from Illinois

We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.

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(301): View more from Maryland

seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...

(443): View more from Maryland

that's spring break in florida for ya

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(203): View more from Connecticut

he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...

(1-203): View more from Connecticut

your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen

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(585): View more from New York

remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.

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(512): View more from Texas

We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.

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(713): View more from Texas

Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together

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(651): View more from Minnesota

I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza

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(410): View more from Maryland

My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.

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