I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize