I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
