Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Still dying that you shit outside
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
