Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize